If you didn't catch the Bridgestone Invitational yesterday at Firestone, you actually missed watching some of the top professional golfers on the planet choking harder than an infant throwing back a 20-ounce porterhouse.
Phil Mickelson was right in the mix, driving that car to the winner's circle until he bogeyed three of his last four holes, all sloppy, all ill-timed, all Mickelson-y.
Everyone's favorite Fijian golfer, Vijay Singh, decided that what Mickelson was doing looked fun, and after making four birdies in his six holes, bogeyed three coming in with a putter that looked shakier than an extra on "Turbulence" with Tourettes (sorry, I'm honing in on my inner-Rick Reilly this morning for some reason).
You know when athletes have quotes that are so deep, so meaningful you realize why they're pros and you're not? Well, this isn't one of those times.
"I was wondering if I tried to hit it as close as possible so I didn't leave myself a putt," Singh said.
Does any of that sentence make sense to you? I'm fairly confused at the point he was making, but I think he is saying that he thought he might wonder if he hit it close to the hole the putt would be as long?
Here, I'll make it a formula.
(Hitting ball far from hole) ~
Got it? Anyway, it was Singh's first WGC title of his career but I still can't consider him a favorite this week at Oakland Hills with that putter. It wasn't pretty, and that's saying a lot when talking about Veej.
Photo courtesy of Stuart Franklin, Getty Images