Friday, April 2, 2010

Donald Trump Thinks Golf is the Reason Tiger Woods Banged Random Chicks


If you kinda wrinkled up your nose and looked away for a second after reading that headline, you're not alone. I have no idea what that means either, but it's true. Donald Trump said the game of golf is why Tiger Woods cheated on his wife. Or something.

Here goes:

"Tiger's a friend of mine. I really like him a lot," the mogul said at Wednesday night's premiere for his show "Donald J. Trump's Fabulous World of Golf."

And get this: Trump insists that Woods' sport is responsible for his indiscretions. "I really think that there's tremendous pressure you wouldn't understand from the world of golf," he said.


Some problems with this theory go as follows.

First, what the hell does Trump know about the pressures of professional golf? This is his golf swing (the 1:36 mark). This is what he looks like on the golf course. He knows as much about professional golf as I do about managing a condo in Las Vegas.

Second, how does this make any sense? He was too strung up because of golf? The guy should be the least strung up because of the game. He wins nearly 50 percent of his tournaments. He was loved by millions. He was the most famous athlete in the world.

I'm pretty sure golf is the last ball that was in charge of his infidelities.

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