Thursday, May 24, 2012

Our Own Cool/Not Cool Golf List

Golf Digest recently rolled out a list of the ten cool and not cool things on a golf course. The article nailed a couple of them (yes, it is uncool to wear red on Sundays like Tiger Woods, but it is also uncool for Tiger to do it), confused with a couple (why the heck is an eraser on a pencil uncool? You think golfers are good at math?!), but generally did what is asked of an article to start a discussion.

So here is our list of cool, uncool things to do on the golf course.

Cool / Not Cool

Cool: Bringing a music player and jamming to music in your cart
Not Cool: Getting mad that someone is enjoying some music and asking them to turn it off (News Alert: it isn't the reason you're sucking).

Cool: Buying drinks from the cart girls/halfway house
Not Cool: Sneaking beers in your bag to the course, you cheap bastard

Cool: Kids in flat-brimmed caps
Not Cool: Anyone over the age of 30 in flat-brimmed caps (via @shosheak)

Cool: Matching your belt with your outfit
Not Cool: Same belt you wear to work is also your only golf option

Cool: Having a coin in your pocket before you get to the first tee
Not Cool: Sticking a tee in the ground for the first nine holes because you "keep forgetting to get a mark"

Cool: Understanding and comprehending how far your hit the golf ball
Not Cool: Waiting for the green to clear when it is literally impossible for you to get there even if you hit the shot of your life and a dust devil picked your ball up mid-air and blew it towards the green

Cool: Offering to buy your playing partners, even if they're total strangers, the first round
Not Cool: Getting a free round and then shying away when the cart girl pulls up

Cool: Desert rules
Not Cool: Re-tee, re-tee, re-tee, re-tee, re-tee, re-tee

Cool: A confident smile after a good shot
Not Cool: "Even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and again."

Actually ... Not Cool: Any golf cliche you have ever heard or have ever said or have ever thought. Everyone hates them. Everyone.

Cool: Saying hi to a left-hander
Not Cool: "Hey, you're hitting from the wrong side of the ball!"

Cool: Waiting until your playing partner is standing over his putt to tell him it's good.
Not Cool: Asking, or begging, for a putt to be given.

Cool: Water slapping a playing partner on a hot day (walk up and throw a small cup of cool water in their face without them knowing it)
Not Cool: Undoing the bag strap on the cart so their clubs fall off when they drive.

Cool: The Club Twirl
Not Cool: The Putter Raise

Cool: A nice, light golf bag
Not Cool: Using a staff bag if you are in fact not on staff with anyone

Cool: Playing fast
Not Cool: Slow play

988 comments:

1 – 200 of 988   Newer›   Newest»
Lefty said...

Buying from the cart girl - cool.

Buying from the cart girl while standing next to the green after you've finished or in the middle of the fairway and the next guys (me) are waiting. Not cool.

Any joke about my being left-handed - not cool because I have heard them before. Trust me.

Driving everywhere in the cart, even on the par 3. "It's almost 30 yards away from the cart path." - not cool.

Driving everywhere in the cart because you are 85 and still love to play golf, but walking is not easy, cool. Always cool.

spackler said...

Cool: Bubba telling Billy Payne that he won't defend his title next year unless Augusta adds some women members.
Uncool: A self-professed deeply religious man ignoring institutional sexism.

Cash said...

Cool - Not really caring about someone else's bag, their clubs, or their belt. We are here to PLAY GOLF, not be Joan f%cking Rivers.

Not Cool - Having an opinion about someone else's Golf bag, their gear, or their belt.

Why that hatin' on a Staff Bag for chrissake? Are you carrying it?

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